We are learning

     The list worked! It worked! She's never responded so well! The kitchen looked great!
     I shared in the previous post that just before Christmas our Natalie was diagnosed with Asperger's. The responses to this info have been varied. Some tell us they are so sorry. Some say they wouldn't have guessed that. Others have just listened. Matt and I, we have been through many emotions.
     I was elated when we first found out; relieved b/c we live in a city that has Aspy specialists that can help us. Then I went through a sort of mourning. Just coming to the understanding that she truly has a "disorder" that we need to address. Then there was more gladness b/c we were finding out before she goes to middle school. My momma heart has always been a little fearful of her heart really getting hurt during that time. Today, I'm good. Just thankful to be learning new ways to help her think. That leads to the next explanation.

     Many ask what the signs are, but that list can be long. I'll just share with you the main things we see at home.

• She gets stuck. Sometimes in fear, sometimes in frustration, sometimes in negativity. Whichever, she doesn't know how to get out of the thought. 
• She sees life in black and white, there is no gray in her mind. 
• She doesn't know how to self reflect. 
• She can't focus on more than one thing at a time, it is just too much for her. When she gets very focused on something and cannot get her mind off of it, we call it "freight training."

     I am learning that if I want her to pick up her towel off the floor now, I cannot just infer that with my voice. I have to say the word "now". 

     We are learning that if we have given her an instruction, and she has started moving in that direction, we cannot then change our minds or add something. She won't hear the addition b/c the "train" is moving.

     I am learning that if I want her to finish a chore the way I expect, I can write out a step by step list and it will be done perfectly! Hence the excitement at the beginning of the blog. She loves to bake cookies, and she is great at it. What is not so great is the end of the process. Everything is left out, cookies are not put away, dishes left, crumbs everywhere. So this last time she wanted to make them I wrote out the list of everything that needed to be done when she is finished. That was all she needed.

  

     The girl is brilliant. Compassionate. Beautiful. She has a different mind, and our God fashioned her that way. We love her beyond words and God has entrusted this learning to us. I am humbled with the journey.